apostles’ fast.

I have been trying to write a few words on fasting, but something has been stopping me, and today I finally understood exactly what.

I fast.  As in, I currently do not consume meat, eggs, dairy.  I moderately consume fish (none on Wednesdays and Fridays), and I try to keep away from tasty guilty-pleasure “fast-approved” things (though I mostly fail at the latter).

All of this, however, doesn’t stop me from being quite gluttonous.  I eat a lot.  Even now, as I’m writing this, I have a rather heavy feeling in my stomach, even though I haven’t consumed anything that’s outside of the rules, and have even eaten rather ‘healthily’.  Yet gluttony and fast can hardly go hand in hand.

It’s hard to write about the aspects and necessity of fasting when one has wolfed down a full course meal and two cups of tea — all the while forgetting to pray before doing it.

Today is Saturday, which usually allows for some indulgence.  Tomorrow, though, as I am going to skip service (due to circumstances and, of course, my sloth, I often do this), I will do my best to keep a proper fast.  So that I shall not feel guilty writing about it.